Fear of Commmmmmitement

Me: Ummmm hi everyone…my name is Jessica.

Everyone: Hiiiiii Jessicaaaaaa

Me: ummm I guess I am here today because I have a problem….

Everyone: ahhhh its alright sis let it out

Me: Ummmm I am a Chronic drama queen and constant flip flopper. I have commitment issues.

Everyone: Its okay, we all have issues this is the safe zone.

Me: I guess it all started back in my childhood when everybody under the sun would buy me and my younger sister the exact same gifts; just in different colors. I never had a chance. I cannot make a decision on my own unless somebody else makes the same decision with me…just in a different color.

Group Leader: This is good, we are in step 2 we have passed the denial stage and are now “accepting” ourselves as we are. All part of the healing process.

Group: Yes (all said in an encouraging tone)

Me: I guess…I mean…..I know what I like to do. I know what I want to do. I have my own ideas… But unless somebody gets on the train with me I just can’t leave the station you know?

Group: nodding in agreement

Group Leader: Hmmmmm. I wonder if we can’t all give Jessica a big safe group hug for this amazing display of bravery.

Group: chairs are squeaking and people are hobbling over to group hug me. It smells like bologna sandwiches.

Me: Thanks everyone. I feel much better. I guess Making the decision to come here today was a step in the right direction huh?

Group Leader: Exactly. All part of the healing process.

Me: I am smart, funny, talented and dogonit people like me no matter what. I am capable of making decisions.